Breaking the silence, Katie comes full circle

Some time ago, I mentioned that part of the reason we began homeschooling was because my older daughter, Katie, struggled with learning disabilities and social phobia. During her first year of kindergarten, she stopped speaking at school and didn't utter a word within the walls of a classroom for the four and a half years that followed. We soon learned that it's a coping mechanism called selective mutism, and as you can imagine, it makes learning in a classroom setting and forming meaningful friendships very difficult.

When we removed Katie from public school at the end of her third grade year, most of her teachers were supportive of our decision. After all, we had done everything we knew to do: we sought the help of various therapists and specialists; we attended parent-teacher conferences: we tracked her progress and updated her IEP; we spent countless hours reteaching and completing school work at home; and we kept enrolling her in school each fall with the hopes that this would be the year she'd start talking.

Her teachers made adaptations to her work and the classroom to accommodate her as best they could. One suggested that Katie learn sign language so they could communicate with one another non-verbally, but we were afraid it would become a crutch and actually cause her to withdraw from us (whom she spoke to regularly at home) rather than encourage her to interact at school. Another insisted that Katie was profoundly autistic and attempted to have her moved into a self-contained special education classroom, which we fought successfully. The school even set up an afternoon home-study program to encourage Katie to talk in a familiar setting (but that didn't work, either). When it became apparent that Katie wasn't making sufficient progress socially or academically, I knew it was time to try home education. That was seven years ago.

Last week, we visited my parents in the Mississippi Delta. My mother teaches at the school Katie last attended and had invited my mother-in-law to speak to her class about birds (My mother-in-law knows everything there is to know about bluebirds.). We brought Katie and Dagny along for the experience. After all, Dagny had never even been inside a classroom before (and, by the way, she reports that she doesn't care for it, either.). And, of course, since many of Katie's former teachers ask my mother about her often, I was anxious to see if Katie would be able to move past her old fears and finally talk to these people. After all, they'd worked with her for years but had never heard her voice.

As we pulled into the parking lot, I delivered my usual "mind your manners" speech to the girls. Since Katie still gets visibly awkward and uncomfortable in new situtaions, her list of reminders includes 1.) don't contort your face, 2.) look at the person who is talking to you, 3.) don't smack yourself in the forehead (as in "I coulda hadda V-8," which she does when she mentally freezes up or doesn't know how to respond to someone), and 4.) keep your hands in your pockets if you feel nervous. Despite her discomfort, she enjoys being around people (especially adults) and is willing to learn how to cope with--or at the very least mask--her anxiety. When I imagine how she feels inside during those quirky moments, I think she's awfully brave.

Speaking of quirky, I had a list of reminders for my mother as well. Those included 1.) don't pressure Katie to talk, 2) try not to make a big deal out of it if she does talk, 3.) if she's standing right there, don't talk about her like she's in another room...which my mom does a lot, 4.) resist the urge to rescue her by finishing her sentences or interpreting for her, and 5.) no matter how emotional this might become, absolutely, positively no crying.

As it turns out, all that worrying was for nothing. Katie seemed almost effortless. She hugged, spoke to, and even initiated conversation with all of her former teachers and assistants. The shocked (but pleased) comments didn't phase her at all, and looks on their faces were priceless. I could tell that she was genuinely happy to be there.

I, however, was a nervous wreck. I was so focused on her and what was happening that I kept forgetting to introduce Jack and Dagny (but, I did remember to keep my hands in my pockets, not make faces and allow others to finish their own sentences ...that's good, right?).

I'm not sure if she realizes the significance of that day or if it was more important to me that she go back to the place that used to paralyze her as a little girl and show them what a smart young lady she has become. There have been so many hurdles, but this was by far one of the biggest.

As we walked out of the building to the parking lot, I asked Kate if she enjoyed seeing her old school again. She thought about it for a moment and said, "It looks exactly the same on the outside, but the heart of it has changed." Considering how much she has changed, I thought that was a rather powerful statement. And at that moment, I realized just how far she had come.

Under the weather

Update: Still sick but getting better. Busy for the rest of this week, but I'll be back next week. Have a happy Halloween!

Blogging will resume when I'm cured of whatever has been clinging to my insides for the last six weeks. For now, so check this out:

Great World Wide Star Count

It's like the Great Backyard Bird Count, except with stars! Now, this sounds like something I can handle (in my frail condition. ::cough cough::).

HT: Susan K.

"Even in the investment markets...

...it's always good to have patience and wisdom."

Courtesy of Pinnacle Trust

Neglectful Seattle parents were not homeschoolers

Any time a case of severe child abuse is widely reported, it is a shocking reminder of the cruel and inhumane treatment that some children endure daily. When those same reports attempt to tie child abuse to home education, it poses a different kind of danger: the threat of increased regulation of homeschoolers based on a negative, baseless stereotype. A distinction must be made every time this occurs.

In a recent news, a 14-year-old girl near Seattle was starved and neglected so severely that she weighed less than my 7 year old daughter. Her father and stepmother were reportedly homeschooling her:

Riverview School District Superintendent Conrad Robertson said the girl had been enrolled in an alternative program for homeschooled students, attending district classes once a week. When a teacher contacted police and state authorities to report concerns on March 4, 2005, the girl stopped attending and her parents withdrew her from the program, he said.

[snip]...but the parents had no contact with the district after March 2005, said Nathan Olson, spokesman for the state Office of the Superintendent of Public Instruction.

"It's safe to say that they were not adhering to state law," he told the P-I.

These people were not homeschooling; they were slowly killing a young teen girl (who was rescued and treated at a hospital).

Documentation and regulation of homeschooling families are often cited as necessary steps to keep individuals from using home education as a cover for criminal behavior, like child abuse. However, the above story (and dozens like it) debunks this. Families who are genuinely teaching their children at home and state agencies that are already burdened will be needlessly penalized by increased oversight. Meanwhile, criminals--who generally don't follow the law--will continue their criminal behavior unchecked.

If oversight and documentation are useless, how can these secretive, abusive households be detected? From the inside through traditional networks of friends, relatives, acquaintances and neighbors. In the Seattle case, a neighbor heard screams and called the police. It was then that the frail, 48-pound teen was discovered.

Not surprisingly, this was not the first time authorities had visited the home:

Three years ago, in March 2005, CPS agents investigated a complaint from the girl's schoolteacher after the child had talked of harsh treatment at home, including being locked in her room and deprived of food.

Investigators found the girl thin and confirmed her allegations, CPS spokesman Thomas Shapley said Monday. It's not clear what happened next, although CPS officials say the mother received counseling.

Lay the blame where it belongs: neglectful parents and a system that is known for its tragic failures. Leave homeschooling out of it.

"Why I (usually) don't vote"

by Jack Criss

[The following was written in November 2000 for Delta Business Journal prior to the Bush-Gore contest. It also appears in Jack's book, Ready, Aim, Right! Editorials, Essays and Reviews 1990-2004. Since it is still relevant, I wanted to share it here.--NC]

When I tell people that, as a matter of principle, I rarely vote, they look at me as if I'm a leper who also happens to be a convicted murderer.

I have heard that, because of my choice not to participate in the "democratic process" I should stop complaining, take a flying leap, or worse. This attitude shocks me.

The choice to vote is not a primary indicator of gauge of freedom. Communist countries consistently report near-perfect turnout for all elections and the reason is simple: citizens are forced to vote. The decision to vote or not to vote is derived from the freedom to think or not to think. This what this country's freedom is truly about, not some secondary concrete such as the right to cast a ballot.

The wars the United States have been involved in, those that were proper, such as the Revolutionary War, were fought for the freedom to think and act as individuals. This being the case, if I cannot bring myself to find a candidate whom I support, why should I have to vote? Why should anyone? The lesser of two evils is still evil.

Besides, in the modern political landscape of the U.S. at the dawn of the 21st Century, the choice is between more government and more government. I was less government and a return to a proper understanding about what the function of government really is. Not to shock you, but this is not forthcoming in November.

Liberals want more of my income to distribute freely as they choose; conservatives want to ban movies and books and install a theocracy. Each group, in other words, wants control: the liberals of my labor, the conservatives of my soul. I want both to myself. Hence, I normally don't vote. Why perpetuate an illegitimate, often illegal, and certainly immoral system? Do you consider it moral to fork over the majority of your income to the State or send your sons and daughters to Bosnia? I don't either, and neither would have Thomas Jefferson or James Madison.

To those who say if you don't vote you shouldn't complain, I sat this in response: if the government quits taxing me and allows me to keep what I rightfully earn, I'll gladly shut up. Until that time, why vote for more bozos who actually, with no qualms, publicly parade for pork like it's a great thing?

Instead of voting, I contribute money to philosophical groups and think tanks that are fighting for the right ideas in the academic and public policy realms. Any true, lasting change will take place in the ivory towers, not in Congress. For it is in our colleges and universities where public officials learn the ideas and get the moral sanctions for them, which they then forge into law to burden individuals and businesses.

The point bears repeating: the choice to vote is not a primary. It is a derivative of the right to think, which is what this country was originally about. We were formed by thinkers to escape tyranny of the mind, not to enshrine and vote it into office as we are doing in America now.

Occasionally I have considered voting for the Libertarian Party presidential candidate, because their party message is one I, for the most part, endorse. This does not make my pro-vote friends any happier, though. I then hear that I'm throwing away my vote. Oh, well. The message seems to be: VOTE...but only for a Republican or Democrat.

Unfortunately, I foresee a day where obtaining a driver's license is directly tied to whether or not one is registered to vote. You read it here first. The "get out the vote" faction is so fanatical that such a message could probably pass with--guess who?--the government's total support.

Our freedoms are being eroded daily by a government that we are supposed to dutifully and unquestionably sanction at the polls every few years. I don't care to support the charade any longer. And to tell you the truth, I'll feel much more patriotic sitting at home reading a good book on election day than going out and playing a game that is rigged so that we all will lose.
---

Jack didn't vote that year, but he is planning to support a third party candidate this cycle.

MS informed vaccination advocate on Supertalk at noon

UPDATE (10/14/08): Debra Barnes was on WLBT news last night at 10p. WLBT emphasized the homeschool connection. Video showed Barnes talking to a reporter in her office during the anchor voice-over. The only audio of Barnes was: "I'd rather my children get the disease than suffer the lifelong, harmful affects of the vaccine" (paraphrased, but that's close).

Today, she is going to be on SuperTalk (97.3 FM Jackson) again today at 11:30a opposite Ed Thompson, MS Dept of Health director. He believes she is giving out untrue information. According to a mutual friend, homeschooling is only a minor part of the discussion now.
--
Debra Barnes, the informed vaccination advocate who was featured in the article posted below, will be interviewed on SuperTalk radio at noon today. She will also appear on WLBT and Fox News (TBA). Barnes feels she was grossly misrepresented by the Clarion Ledger. Apparently, AP has picked up the article, and her phone is ringing off the hook.

In a recent announcement, she stated: ..."this makes me understand what a battle the vaccine front will be in MS, and how we need each and every one of you to stand up and make a difference."

MS homeschoolers and vaccination in the news (updated)

Update (10/18/08): According to Joyner, the Clarion Ledger was printing a correction today regarding the requirement of homeschoolers in Mississippi to register. Can anyone confirm this? It is not on the web site.

Although homeschooling seems to be playing a less significant role in the local vaccination discussion, it isn't going away. A version of this article and the correction will drop in USA Today some time this week.
---

I got a media request about two weeks ago from Chris Joyner, the reporter who wrote this piece. In my opinion, vaccination is not a homeschool issue (it's a parents' rights issue). I didn't respond, because I don't have a horse in that race. Plus, I knew there'd be contradictions like this:

In August, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in Atlanta reported measles cases had spiked, with 131 cases reported for the first seven months of the year, compared to an average of 63 cases per year since 2000. Of the infected patients, 91 percent were unvaccinated, most because of "philosophical or religious beliefs." None of the cases was in Mississippi.

What percentage of the 91% were homeschoolers? If a local journalist is going to link home education and non-vaccination in Mississippi, that is one question he should have asked. He should also do his homework:

Like many states, Mississippi does not require parents to register their children if they intend to home school.

Wrong, Mr. Joyner. Look it up. Homeschoolers register with local attendance officers once a year (whether or not we are "required" to is another issue entirely. The point is that we do.).

Since Mississippi is one of only two states that does not allow religious/philosophical exemptions for vaccinations, that means that there are scores of children in other states who are going to public and private schools despite the fact that they have not had their shots.

So...is it a compliance issue or a homeschool issue? Should all children be caught in the "vaccine net" or just homeschoolers? Should Mississippians even be concerned about this? I dunno. The writer does not address those questions, either.

All states allow unvaccinated children to attend school with a medical doctor's excuse. Mississippi and West Virginia alone allow no exemptions beyond medical necessity, leaving parents with home-schooling as the only option if they do not want to have their children vaccinated.

That's almost misleading. Many homeschooling families (dare I say most) vaccinate their children. And the homeschooling families I know personally who opt not to vaccinate or who practice selective vaccination are not fugitives hiding the kids in the basement from the vax police; they're serious about home education.

Last year, Arthur Caplan, chair of the Department of Medical Ethics at the University of Pennsylvania, co-authored an article in the Journal of Law, Medicine and Ethics advising states to get more serious about compelling the vaccination of home-schooled students [snip].

The article - or excepts from it - have been passed around among home-schooling advocates the past year as evidence of a conspiracy to force mandatory vaccinations on their children.

Lovely, the homeschooler-as-gov't-conspiracy-theorist stereotype.

Was the article passed around by homeschooling advocates or anti-vaccine advocates? Those two phrases are not interchangeable. I think Mr. Joyner needs to be more careful with that broad brush.

Whether one opposes or supports vaccination, the bottom line is this: homeschoolers are not hazardous to your health.

Sure, I'll get right on that...

...just as soon as I finish looking at this internet procrastination flowchart.

HT: Lisa W.